Category Archives: Uncategorized

6 ways to be more authentic in an artificial world

I want to take this moment to talk to you about something that keeps showing up on my intuition raider. Little signs all around keep pointing to this topic so I’m gonna finally give it the nod and address it.

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THIS MAGICAL WORD: Authentic. Aka genuine / original / real / true. The actual legit truth.

In a world filled with hidden agendas it can sometimes be quite hard to be your truest self; especially when you are still trying to learn who that truest self actually is.

We are constantly bombarded with images from the media that are edited within an inch of their life but I think most of us now know to question the reality of what the media and advertising agencies are up to; but on a more personal level – we are now suffocating in the ‘digital noise’ of others that then make us feel just that less in love with our own self.

Take selfies for example, we can sometimes forget that they (or we?) took 20 outtakes before finding the one with just the perfect amount of pout, then filtering it to brighten the colour or set a mood, throw in a bit of airbrushing or bokeh and send it out to the world with hash tags about how great life is #livingthedream. Oh, and don’t get me wrong in saying all that – I absolutely do this, too.

I am building myself a brand. I do these things with intentions of mimicking an aesthetic that matches my inner spirit, therefore (most of the time) I have pure soul-led intentions. The social media world pins us all together in such an unnatural way it’s easy to fall prey to comparison traps. I fall into them daily. “She’s so creative” “she’s got the best body” “I will never be that successful” “Why couldn’t I think of that?!”. It’s time to stop. If I’m saying that about them, maybe others are saying that about me, they are thinking that about someone else – and it keeps going on, around and around in circles. How exhausting, how debilitating to the collective consciousness.

I am now learning new ways to try and be my most authentic. My true self. No smoke and mirrors. Raw spirit. Truth. Transparency. I feel I do that a lot in my writing and sharing of my journey and whenever I create something new or have a new idea, I am now better able to decipher the genuine self from the imitation self.

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Screen shots from my very first ‘vlog’ asking for your support recently – weirdo faces, right?!

I’m slowly trying to not worry about what others think of me and focus more on what I think about my own self – it is challenging – but it’s also very freeing. When you stop caring you start living. You stop holding yourself back. And guess what happens when you stop holding yourself back? You come into your truth. You align and you soar. Then you just get on with the life you dream about.

One big thing I have been asking myself is why? Why am I doing this? What’s the desired outcome? You might be surprised at what the answer is. And don’t try and bullshit yourself, doesn’t work. Trust me – I’ve done it. You can only be a fool to yourself for so long (after all, your super intuitive like that.)

So, lets get down to it shall we?
How do you go back to your authentic self in an unauthentic world?

1. Motivations – do the old ‘go within’ and see what comes up first BEFORE you act.
Ask yourself; What motivates me?

Is it to get more likes? why? does that align with your spirit?
To be perceived as trendy? why? does that align with your spirit?

To look like you are smarter? funnier? more wealthy? more intellectual? more creative? more in love than you actually are? why? does that align with your spirit?

It’s ok to do unauthentic things, it really is. We are all human that crave that connection. But more importantly this is about the WHY…. getting to know yourself better. Provoke that thought and learn to love these imperfections you have (we all have them!).

2. Do shit offline. Would it still be done in your day to day life? What should truly be documented and shared and what is just a reflection of how your feeling today? Need validation? Need to be told your beautiful? Need a hug? Go on, give those things to yourself in real life. It will feed your soul so much more, I promise.

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like my modern spin on the ol’ tree falling philosophy? 😉

3. Block out the excess noise. Fighting yourself constantly to ‘be’ someone? Be better? Be different? Be like her? Can’t tear yourself away from stalking their profile or website and sighing like you aint’ ever gonna be that good. Well, here’s an extreme (but helpful) measure – unlike/unfollow them! Just for a month. See what a difference it makes in your life. Or delete facebook/IG altogether! Some of my friends have done this and express how liberating it is to get back to their authentic, simple life.

4. Be vulnerable. People love the unpolished, un-edited you. Your a real person;  not a
Magazine spread. You have wrinkles, freckles, weird teeth, bad regrowth, hairy legs. Don’t filter that shit out of oblivion. Small chubby hands? And design rings (like me)? Oh the irony. Rock that shit anyway, at least others will feel a sense of reality and self in that action and be left with a feeling of equality, rather than inferiority.

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5. The “what would my spirit do?” question – as in, when you’re about to take any action – whether it be start a new course, get a job, take a photo, buy a concert ticket, shop for new clothes – ask yourself “what would my spirit do?” – not this whole “what would Miranda Kerr do” or “what would Oprah do” – that’s just putting people up on a pedestal in YOUR life that make you feel like you have to always be BETTER. Do BETTER. Choose BETTER. Stop that, it’s soul destroying and artificial. The harder question is – what the hell would your spirit do? That deepest, most raw, natural, soulfulness that resides in you? DO THAT. Fuck what ‘others’ are doing.

6. Find your voice – don’t mimic others – Ain’t no copycat ever find happiness or fulfilment on a soul level when they followed an unauthentic path. I absolutely love this post from one of my mentors – Leonie Dawson – how to deal with copycats – check it.

There is a difference between experimentation or trend/play; do it for you first – and others second. Remember too that authenticity is a process, as we are always growing, learning and living and experiencing this life in real time – so too our spirits move with us in this way.

Luckily for me, when I haven’t been authentic or motivations were for artificial reasons – the universe has picked up on that and it’s never come to reality or given me my desired outcome. The most authentic and organic actions have made the biggest impact – so that’s filled my heart with enough authentic soul stroking for me to move forward in that direction, further away from the ego moves and more towards me being the real deal Sarah Williams.

I would love to know what you do to help with staying authentic too! I think its such a fascinating topic, and we are all so caught up sometimes on what others think about us, but not what we think about us – which I think is the key to happiness.

Love, light & authenticity

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My personal psychic reading experiences and knowing which one is right for you

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Psychic readings have a bit of a reputation for being a bit hit and miss and it’s super important to either be recommended by others or to know that this person has great success in their field but more importantly to also trust your own gut when it comes to deciding when and who to ask for a reading.

The majority of the planet don’t really want to know anything about themselves or their spirit guides or get messages from people who have passed and that is totally ok! Some of us are just happy letting nature take its course and don’t really believe – so naturally, if you aren’t drawn to it you simply don’t do it – but for me – I need confirmation from the universe that my own intuition is right and I cannot explain how amazing the feeling is when someone tells you things about yourself and your future that you can already see or feel is your truth.

It’s so exciting when I feel really aligned, in tune and ready to own my power and trust that what I’m doing truly is the right path and journey for me in this lifetime. Sometimes it just takes someone to tell you something at the right place and time to help it truly sink in. Especially when you are paying them for this information, which I think plays a big part in the process on a subconscious level!

If you have been thinking about getting yourself a reading from someone, I highly recommend it. However it’s not something to rush into and sometimes life throw you signs as if to say “your not ready for it yet!” – (such as missing out on my free readings on Monday nights :) ) but when you do and you feel that magic feeling; it really can change your life.

Here are my tips to finding the right person to ask for a reading:

1. They are highly recommended by friends or family; or you have heard stories on how accurate the reading was from them – or, you have seen them in action and click with them instantly!

2. They have a very successful business with a bonus of a great testimonials page and you connect with them upon researching them online.

3. Your gut tells you this person is the right person to be asking for a reading at this time.

4. Know what it is your looking for before you ask someone. There are so many different readers out there and they all serve different purposes – read the most common list here. They of course all use different tools – personal belongings, a huge array of tarot and oracle cards, birth charts, ruins, crystal balls, crystals, even tea leaves! The list is endless and can be daunting and confusing. Think about what it is you truly want from them and work back towards what they offer and see who’s services resonate with you.  

If things don’t work out don’t be disheartened. You have most likely still seen the right person, at the right time and for the right reasons. Think about it – if you get a reading from someone and it doesn’t ‘speak’ to you – what is that telling you about yourself? did you trust your intuition? or did you need to have that reading in order to give yourself clarity on what it is YOU really want to happen? regardless, have you still learnt something? These things happen for a reason!

After all, we are the masters of our own destiny and your path is not written in stone. It is in the embodiment of that reading in mind/body/spirit that allows for you to create your own truth; as the message is simply something you needed to hear in order to follow your own intuition at this time.

There really is no right or wrong reading – it’s all about perception, intuition and interpretation.

In saying all this, I want to share a few things with you about my personal experiences with some readings I have had over the last few weeks to perhaps help you to decide what kind of reading is right for you- but to also help you to understand the process a bit better.

Personally, I’ve only ever really had readings from my myself, mum, aunty and played around with reading each other with friends many moons ago. Since I’ve now decided to offer paid readings online, I have felt the need to experience readings from others to help me to not only grow and learn as a reader but to also learn more about myself and my path, too. I am intuitive & psychic to a degree (we actually all are) and currently I resonate most with being a ‘diviner’ and these gifts are being opened up more each day, but there is something special about hearing it from someone you respect and trust, but don’t really know – to help you to make sense of your world and what it is you truly want.

Through my blog I’ve been contacted by many beautiful souls which lead me to places I have never heard of – forums, groups of like-minded people and the such. Cue my discovery of KV and her universe which is known as Aquarius Nation. Based in Santa Fe, New Mexico – KV instantly got my attention as someone who I just had to get a reading from. Her messages are so profound and I connected with her and her teachings instantly.

I want to share with you some key things her reading confirmed for me, as I asked for a reading of my birth chart from her in regards to my soul’s purpose.

Here’s what really resonated for me:

INSIDE

“You are one of the oldest souls on this planet; you have all the information you need inside”.

“These next several years you will be meeting your guides and discovering a new comfort and new solid connection that will pull you through anything”.

“You will be gifted with helping others to get more out into the world just because you love it and talk about it”.

“You will come up with those beautiful magical words that really soothe an injured soul and set them on the right track to go out there and soar in life”.

“You are very in tune, and you need to honour that because your information comes from existential sources and it comes up through your intuition as a sign or a feeling or with how something maybe just doesn’t smell right. you can always trust this, 100% of the time”.

“You are very in tune with what others need as you are ultra sensitive to subtle vibrations and are also more than willing to come forward and help, and that is so kind of you”.

“You are like a tower of strength to others and they really do see you as a sort of hero”.

“You will always have opportunities that will drop into your lap to be this upstanding teacher who is here to guide others”

“Always pulling information from above and from your 3rd eye, you are hooked up in a way so that the channel is always open and sharing information that is quite ahead of the times. maybe some have thought you are a freak because they don’t understand what you are saying, but with the right crowd of awakened souls, they are in complete unison with your visionary words.”

“That mind of yours is always churning away trying to figure everything out and trying to always come up with the perfect answer”.

“You will be sharing wisdom of the highest caliber through writing, publishing or something internet related. you are hear to share the new world energy and in a very positive and humanitarian sort of fashion.”

“In past lives you were possible something like a witch or someone who was persecuted because their gifts were not understood.”

“You will gain much experience on the shamanic path with shamanic studies. but you already know everything you will learn from anybody else as you incarnated with this powerful wisdom”.

“You will be the ultimate teacher guide”

“I just heard the world midwife – you might want to study something like this”

“You are to leap often!” “requires your heart on your sleeve”

“You worked so hard to be able to incarnate as this great wise old soul teacher that you will be. so honour that and do not question this life now”.

Now, for anyone who has followed my blog posts for the last year will know that everything she told me is BANG ON. Like, after reading that (the skeptic in me still hasn’t quite left the building) It honestly flashed into my mind that she can’t have known all that about me and I thought she must have read my blog or cyber stalked me. Now, I know that’s 100% not true because ‘ain’t no body got time fo dat’! I know this woman is the real deal and she wouldn’t be nearly as successful as she is if she was a stalker. ha! This is a true testament to her ability and she will forever be my big soul sister as we are very similar in a lot of ways and I’m so thankful to have connected with her.

Now, if that isn’t cool enough for you, queue yesterdays adventures. I saw an ad on TV to go to the “fantabulous” psychic expo here in Townsville. I felt a calling so I took myself and my little boy to the expo to check it out. There I found an international psychic medium by the name of Cassandra Eason  who has written 95 (!!!!) books, has been on UK & US television and radio spots for her work and is also a celebrity psychic. So, of course – I picked her to give me a reading.

Picture source: www.thecronicle.com.au

Picture source: www.thecronicle.com.au

We sat down, and she instantly connected with my son. She told me he was one of the rainbow children (will do a blog post about these soon) and also spoke about my father who has passed and told me he is with Billy and always protects him (confirming to me my hunch as to why this kid has NEVER had a bad boo boo, even at 16 months old and has many close encounters with the floor/chair/tiles/wall/cement). It was so nice to hear about my dad finally. She told me my son is will be an animal healer and is very connected with animals (spot on). There was loads more, but I won’t go into too much detail, will save for another post regarding spiritual children.

Anyway, funnily enough – Cassandra also told me I would be writing books and I would be connecting with women on spiritual journeys and also made emphasis on maidens and mothers and working with women through pregnancy, birth and motherhood. (midwife reference?!). This has confirmed to me about my new sister company to The Fifth Element Life that will see me working with women in this way. This business is still in planning stages but this reading has basically confirmed for me that it’s exactly what I need to be doing right now.

She saw a location change ahead for our family, and once the move has taken place – everything is going to align and we are going to hit the ground running. (We are working hard on manifesting a move to the Sunshine Coast at the moment).

Cassandra told me my first book would be about my own journey, and would be something to do with “spiritual motherhood” – she said she could see that I was a very laid back mum who connected on a deeper level with my child and that I would be helping other mums to trust their intuitive selves to do the same. She said I could have been born 5000 years ago as my instincts are so ancient, as in not been influenced by modern day parenting styles. I was also asked if I read tarot and I said yes, and she asked me if I had thought about going professional – so that was another lovely little boost of confidence for me to know that my reading abilities are developing well enough that she picked up that I should be offering them as a paid service (if I wasn’t already).

So anyway, I’m sorry that may have turned into a bit of a yawn fest for anyone other than myself! But my point is that these readings have really cemented some key aspects of my path to myself – and I am so grateful to have been intuitively led to both of these amazing people.

I would say these readings were life changing to me because they have given me exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the right time of my life – and they are pushing me forward at a time I could easily choose to let self-sabotage break my spirit.

If you have any further questions or want to share your reading stories with me, please do! I love hearing about them!

Love, light & psychic readings

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The mandala story

edited niceHOORAY! My beautiful mandala ring creations have FINALLY arrived in their first (very small) drop into my crafty (but chubby) little hands!

If you haven’t already heard much about them; I thought I would share with you how they came about as It’s been a long journey; but absolutely perfectly timed by the universe. I’m sure you’ve noticed this is not your conventional spring/summer catalogue style range; business or product. I purposely chose to go with a more personal, organic approach to creating, producing and sharing my creations with the world and here is a bit more of the story on how they came to fruition.

Mid 2012, whilst pregnant with my son; I was closing down my previous business (Saralli Design) and wanting to create some basic tools to help me to create change in my life, on my terms. Coming from a jewellery and accessory fashion background, I wanted to design something that I not only was proud of but also was something I could use in my everyday life to help me grow, learn and make great things happen. Something affordable, special, unique and so spiritually switched-on that no matter what happened next, I knew the universe would feel all the positivity oozing from my creations and I wouldn’t ever have to worry about their success.

My attention quickly directed towards sacred geometry; symbolism and this wonderful word ‘mandala’.

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They are a form of artistic expression using geometry and symbolism which holds a imprinted message within its design and represents particular stories from the creator. They are particularly helpful in therapeutic and religious contexts, and I wanted to harness the beauty, simplicity and universal acceptance of this form of design in my work.

Thus, the ELEMENTAL MANDALA COLLECTION was birthed.

I designed 20 unique mandala symbols, all of which carry a beautiful message in their symbolism. Without using cliches or religiously restricting themes, these mandalas are simple, aesthetically beautiful and universal. Anyone from any walk of life can find their own special message in their design. Its all about using this symbol as a vessel to remind you of what it is you want, and helps you get it. Each individual is encouraged to find their own meaning, fashion their own message for their own life.

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So I had the ONE little prototype made up; and I sat and waited for further instruction from the universe as to how to move forward next. No financial backing, about to have a baby – was I ready to launch a new business too? I had every intention to make it happen; but the WHEN was the big question how do you know when? how would I ever get the money, the time, the energy, the following they deserve?

I waited. I knew it was going to be something worth waiting for, so this kept me optimistic, driven but calm.

It took all of last year to fine tune the design, from my hand sketches and measurements, to working out the best way to get my digital symbols onto a ring without compromising the details. It was a huge task! I spoke to many different people, all over the country – and as much as I wanted this to be an Australian made product, I simply couldn’t find anyone to do it the way it needed to be done.

thecrewEventually, I found this lovely little Balinese jewellery designer who helped me bring my vision to life. They bought a new printing machine around the time I asked them to produce my work for me, and they have worked tirelessly for me for months (apparently each ring takes 3 whole days to complete production!) and my first drop has arrived to me here, in Townsville – with the help of pre-sales from my website which allowed me the capital to make it all happen!

I’m being so totally transparent here because I believe this is the future of business; this is how we fall in love with the things we buy. I want this to be the reason why you would choose to support my tiny little business over something mass produced by a huge, faceless company overseas.

You see; I have absolutely no intentions for this to be a multi-million dollar collection, in fact, as you read above – my production line simply couldn’t support that kind of business if it tried! But I do have intentions of always being open to opportunities, possibilities and for everything to progress much more organically as this product development process was. To be forthcoming when it comes to my intentions in life and business and to always stay in check with my own spirit is what I’m all about, and I’m so humbled with the support that has been shown so far and look forward to continuing to share these little gifts of light with you all in the future.

If you want to get your hands on one; there are a limited amount left from the first drop – check out the listings over at TFEL ONLINE STORE – and if you have already missed out, I have left the pre-sale link open for you to secure the one you are coveting, which will arrive in the next drop within a month.

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Thanks again to everyone for all your lovely words, your support and of course for loving my mandala rings as much as I loved creating them for you!

Love, light & mandala magic

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Take a walk with me, sister.

WANDEROf late; I’ve been attracting MANY beautiful soul sisters who have been sharing their personal journey’s with me, privately. They have expressed how hard some days are; how alone it can be and also how exposing it can be to put your true self out there.

As modern day women, we are conditioned to mimic modern day lives that don’t allow us to fully harness our own timeless potentials; often our modern lives are dictated by things like –

  • New traditions **sometimes fads** (in the form of how to dress, act, eat, exercise, live, enjoy life)
  • Our circle of peers – sometimes we don’t feel completely ourselves in social settings, especially when there is a side to you that aches to connect, yet hasn’t found the right people to connect with on that level (but thank god for social media, right?!)
  • The media –  we are still bombarded by sensationalised images and stories that pull us back into societal norms, and often away from our independent thinking  – whether it be regarding health, vaccination, parenting, diet, lifestyle, religion/faith etc
  • Our elders – Our parents brought us up into this world; and often some expect you to think they like did or live the way they chose to; it is often hard to find a balance between taking your own path and staying connected as a family and knowing which rituals to honor or move away from.
  • Our partners – As masculine energies are more practice, physical, rational, dominant we often feel our partners cannot relate to us if we feel a certain way about something; or have trouble communicating what it is we want.

However; there is an increasing amount of modern day women, who also have very old, wise and connected souls; of which are beginning to be awoken due to many shifts happening within the universe (I won’t scare you off with this stuff, but I will in future share more about this if you are interested). I want to let you know that this is your time. I want to tell you it’s ok to follow your heart; your intuition and your spirit to that place no one quite understands (nor do you for that matter!).

Months ago, I was laying in bed and in one of those more often than not late night brain explosions; I just started writing this poem.

It was only a few weeks later that I lost that phone; and that poem along with it.

That was a sign to let it go; and to re-write it at a later date when the timing felt right. So, a few weeks ago, I re-wrote it (probably much different to the original) and want to share it with you, today.

It’s all about allowing yourself to venture into the wild unknown that is your spirit; a beautiful way to let the people in your life (especially your friends who you have feel disconnected with) that you are still you; but that you are growing; learning; expanding in ways they may not align with or quite understand. This is ok; this is what life is all about. Our differences; our unique view of our worlds and our own truths. Embrace it; embrace the magic that is you.

TAKE A WALK WITH ME, SISTER.

BY SARAH WILLIAMSsister

Take a walk with me sister; for I have so much to tell
It’s not going to be easy; some things, they hurt like hell

Take a walk with me sister; I wish to show you this side
The part of me that is changing, It ebbs and flows like the tide

Take a walk with me sister; I promise not all things will change
I’m simply growing into my own skin, discovering my truth, its full range.

Take a walk with me sister; sometimes I feel so alone
But I’ve learnt to embrace this, in myself I finally feel home.

Take a walk with me sister; there’s a freedom that I’ve found
This place it has no limits, no restrictions and no bounds.

Take a walk with me sister; I’m so glad to tell you from my heart
It’s time I must go inward, focus on my journey, on my art

Take a walk with me sister; hold my hand as we converse
Lets never forget this moment, this bond we can’t reverse

Take a walk with me sister; thank you for trusting in me
It’s your love and understanding that has helped me to set free

Take a walk with me sister; please don’t ever leave my side
We may change the course momentarily, but I promise I’m in for the ride

And should your feet ever want to stop, or to rest upon the sand
Just know I will always feel that too, we will forever be connected by this same land.

If at anytime should you feel the pull to wander deep into the unknown
Summon me, I will hold your hand, from the same vine I have grown.

My light is your light, let the path unfold; should you ever feel lost for a place to start  

All you need to do is whisper…….‘Take a walk with me, sister’.

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photo credit: Charley Greenfield (amazing soul sister of mine, check this babes work out here)

Love, light & sisterhood

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How to ask the right questions in a tarot reading

dark,fashion,fortuneteller,goth,vintage,arab-b7ff0baa9dffb25741000637cacdcd76_hAs some of you know I have been offering one card tarot readings on my Facebook page each Monday night for the last few weeks, to help me develop my reading skills for future endeavours.

The more I submerge myself into this practice, the more I am learning about myself, about my capabilities, as well as my not-so-clear intentions!

I want to take this opportunity to teach you how to best prepare yourself before you ask for a reading (from myself or anyone else!) which in turn is going to help me greatly with clearly portraying my intentions with clients in the future.

I guess I want to be less of a “fortune teller” and more of a “mystic mentor” – a mystic is someone who sees more to life than what is usually perceived, someone who has formed a union with the universe, in order to exchange truths about ones existence/truth/journey. As you all should know by now, I’ve embarked on a bit of a spiritual adventure in the last 12 months, and I guess I consider myself a bit of an alchemist; a mystic-in-training.

That said, I also feel driven to help others – at my very core, this is what makes me most at peace.

With my readings – my intentions are that I want to help you, to provide insight into situations you encounter on your journey – helping you to see something in a new light. To heal, to inspire, to support and to motivate. I have absolutely no right to tell you whether or not your going to have a baby this year or not; nor do I claim to have the ability to predict your future. (That’s more of a psychic thing).

So, lets start this again – shall we? Let’s set some clear ground rules for future readings together, so that we can all have the purest of intentions, and to really make the most out of my free services right now.

ONE CARD READINGS

How to ask the right question in a tarot reading:

1. Firstly, you need to keep the question open – it cannot have just a yes or no answer

example – *Will I get the job I applied for? (NOT GOOD)
Instead, ask *Can you give me more insight into what I need to know about my next career move (GOOD!)

Need help? Here are some great ways to start your question, without it ending up being a yes or no type deal…

* Can you provide me with further insight towards….
* What do I need clarification on in regards to…..
* What was the meaning of….
*How might I know when….
* What was the lesson to be learnt from….
* How can I improve upon my chances of……

2. Please avoid questions relating to time – eg when is my house going to sell? and also avoid starting questions with SHOULD you do something…. this is still a yes or no question.

3. Another thing to consider is the level of detail you want to share – I understand in a public forum, it’s instinct to be more vague so the noisy parkers don’t learn something new about you, but there is a key to finding a happy medium here.

for example:
too specific: How can I tell John he no longer has the job?
too vague: How do I tell that individual what I intend to do?
best, neutral question: What do I need to know about John’s further involvement within the company?

4. the trick is to not already have a desired outcome in mind.

When will I get pregnant? – as in, you want to be pregnant. This is moving toward the fortune tellers land…we don’t want to go there anymore!

What do I need to know about my reproductive health at this time? – This shows that the question is neutral, you want to gain further insight into why or why not something is happening/not happening.

5. Then there is also another key point to consider – to always ask a question about your own life, not someone else’s. You are the focus!

So, in summary – here’s the key points to remember:

AVOID QUESTIONS THAT RESULT IN A YES OR NO ANSWER
FIND A HAPPEN MEDIUM WITH LEVEL OF DETAIL IN YOUR QUESTION
STAY NEUTRAL – DON’T ASK A QUESTION YOU HAVE ALREADY MADE YOUR MIND UP ABOUT
AVOID ANYTHING THAT SOUNDS LIKE IT REQUIRES SOME SORT OF FUTURE PREDICTING!
KEEP YOURSELF AS THE FOCAL POINT – DO NOT ASK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLES LIVES

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This is specifically to do with the one card readings I have been offering for free – with regards to different spreads you will be required to ask different questions and provide different information; but this is a great beginners guide to understanding what the essence of tarot is – and how to get the best response that will resonate with you the most.

It also protects me, because I have been naively answering most, if not all questions that have been thrown my way, and this has ended up with me being more of a fortune teller, which is not my truth. It doesn’t mean it won’t pan out or that anything bad will happen, I simply want to move away from that direction and establish clearer ground rules for moving forward with this.

I encourage you to come to me and ask the tarot and the universe for clarity, insight and wisdom. Anything else, please know that I love you, but I won’t be going there anymore! It is not capturing the essence of what I’m about.

I hope this has cleared things up for you, and look forward to seeing your thoughtfully prepared questions for the readings to come!

Love, light & mystics-in-training

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My beef with vegans*

go-vegan-I-think*By vegans, I mean some (a minority) of vegans. Yes I am making a sweeping generalisation, but in all honestly I thought it would grab the most attention, I feel what I have to say is important and needs to be reached far and wide, so please – read on.

3 years ago, almost to the day – I made a spur of the moment, cold-turkey decision to go vegetarian. I had my very last quarter chicken and chips from Red Rooster the night before, not even knowing it would be the last time I would voluntarily eat a baked bird again.

The catalyst was watching a movie called Earthlings –  and what was burnt into my retainers that day, 3 years ago, I still carry deep within my soul and will take some time for me to heal this hurt, but I’m working on it!

After seeing this film, I was angry. I was so pissed off with myself, with the human race, with what we had become, with what we were consciously inflicting on other life just in the name of profit, made me so filled with deceit, betrayal and heart ache. I was ashamed to be a homo-sapien. Since then, across my social media outlets, in my peer group I found I attracted the debate, the taboo topic that was vegetarian and veganism. Since then I had been a loud, proud vegetarian, quick to share links of tortured animals on Facebook, online petitions to sign to save certain species and participated in hot debate on the topics of animal cruelty, plant based diets and animal exploitation on social and mainstream media platforms, always quick to defend the cause, and belittle the ones who didn’t agree. At the core of it was that I always carried such loathing for my own race, in hindsight, was not a healthy way to live. I was not setting a good example.

I found myself carrying an agressive, hateful, and, now that I reflect back on it – a bit of a “I’m more evolved than you” attitude towards others and it wasn’t until maybe a few months ago (most likely coinciding with me learning more about myself, my spirituality and becoming more ‘me’) that I found myself on a vegan activist page on Facebook, where they had written a status about the Dalai Lama and how he wasn’t even fully vegan and that they read or saw somewhere he ate some meat dishes occasionally and that he was a hypocrite and they lost all faith in him because if he really practiced what he preached -with regards to practicing compassion and love, that he should be completely vegan etc etc.

As I read through the hateful comments, something in me clicked. I thought, hang on a minute – I don’t belong here. This is not what veganism is about to me. YES – veganism is a movement that is about bringing the atrocities that humans fall prey to into the light, it’s about being a voice for the voiceless and standing up for what feels right within your core. I get it. I honestly do. Of course I don’t want any sentient being being murdered, skinned alive, electrocuted in the anus to a slow, painful death (yes, that really happens TODAY) purely for our own greed and satisfactions, but what I have come to learn is that in order to REALLY ‘sell’ this way of living, we must do it from a place of love, not hate.

For example, once upon a time this would have been my argument:

Direct from that hateful place; my EGO talking:

If you are not vegan, you do not really love animals. You are contributing to corporate greed, feeding government agenda, poisoning your body and limiting its spiritual potential, destroying the planet and its resources, murdering innocent lives purely for your own pleasure, supporting animal slavery, torture and mistreatment in the masses, contributing to ecological disasters, creating disease within your bodies (etc etc). You, on average, consume over 200 animals PER YEAR – which in a lifetime (say of 65 years)  is 13 000 lives you have taken, all in the name of “yum!” Blood is on your hands, it’s time to wake up; evolve; be accountable; be the change. Stop eating the flesh of other animals, your disgusting and I am ashamed to call myself human.

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Then I would include something like this clip for you to watch: (please do so if you dare!)

So, how did that make you feel? Like I was talking down to you? What emotions did you feel? anger? guilt? shame? pissed off? at me, at you? Does it make you want to look more into veganism, or just crawl into a little shell and burry those feelings over a big mac, never to want to expose yourself to anything like that, again? oh, AND maybe you now hate all vegans, because they are bullies? Or, you might hate all humans because they are so senseless.

YES, it has impact. Yes, sometimes that’s enough to make someone have that “a-ha!” moment. But what I now see is that even though I might have guilted someone into feeling bad enough to stop eating meat, I’ve hurt their soul. Like I hurt mine. I have made them feel ashamed, and carrying that burden, the weight of the world on your shoulders doesn’t make you any healthier, wiser or more evolved. Hate just makes you unhappy, it holds you back.

Now, on the other side of the spectrum – coming from a place of absolute LOVE of vegetarian and veganism, I would prefer you see it like this, direct from my HEART:

Since reducing my meat and dairy intake, I cannot express how profoundly my life has changed. Initially, It was a challenge. I had to relearn how to eat. I was a meat and carb for every meal kinda gal. It taught me to go back to basics, and really look into my nutritional intake, my impact on the planet and helped me to realign with my beliefs. I feel like the best version of myself, without a word of a lie, like a fog has lifted from my mind and I can see things much more consciously. It’s like I woke up. I’m happier, healthier – I’ve lost over 10kgs, my skin tone is much more even and I have healed myself of a few health issues, I have more energy, my moods are much more stable and I feel so much more connected to the earth and truly feel like I am making a positive difference to my life, and the planet.

I’m so excited to share this with my own children and to reinforce their love of all animals by not having to expose them to the disconnections that the corporations have created towards animal consumption. Embracing a plant-based diet has enabled me to thrive in all aspects of my life, it’s inspired me to become more health conscious and to embrace what it really means to be a human – I truly believe the human race is here to be the guardians of all other life – the plants, the animals, the ocean, the land.  All of it is not ours to own, but is ours to protect. I am so proud of myself for being the change I wish to see in the world.

and then I would ask you to look at this beautiful clip :) (and yes, I just watched it and my eyes filled up with happy tears…reminds me I am alive and I have a choice!)

Pam-and-Edgar

thanks to Edgar’s Mission for the beautiful clip and image, and all the amazing, selfless, positive, life changing work you do.

So – how did that make you feel? do you want to be like me, feel how I feel? Does it inspire you to improve on your current habits, or to learn more about plant-based diets?

Whilst I do think most vegans have the purest of intentions, and also have extremely open hearts – I do think some get a little bit lost in the cause. For me, I feel that simply by exposing myself to the truth ( through the graphic imagery; the heartbreaking articles or soul-destroying real footage) It gave me that initial push to DO SOMETHING. Now, I feel my energy will be more effective by inspiring fellow humans through my own positive story, through my own physical, mental and spiritual growth, journey and increased wellness and to spread more love, to attract more love in return. To heal from within my own self, to then help heal others as a bi-product.

For example, instead of dragging myself into debates about what the Dalai Lama eats for breakfast, I’ve shifted my focus more on being uplifted and inspired by other amazing vegetarians and vegans who don’t preach, who don’t judge – who just live their truth, and are thriving!

vegie headFor example, one of my favourite vegan foodies Adele @ VegieHead creates amazing plant-based recipes, e-books and workshops and she is just seriously one of the most beautiful people, inside and out. She never bullies anyone into her way of living; but is inspiring people in droves because she shines so bright, that we are all like beautiful bugs to her flame! Now THAT’S how you get others to go vegan!

nadineAnd closer to home, a fellow soul-sister of mine – Nadine @ Nadine Lee Nutrition recently wrote about how she broke her strict veganism to honour what her intuition was telling her about what her body needed (at a cellular level!); I applaud her honestly, integrity and sheer love for herself – Nadine is also beautiful, inside and out – and it’s her vulnerability and courage to share things like that with the world that makes me see just how beautiful plant-based living can be!

Love feeds love, hate feeds hate – so I’m done with manifesting that negative stuff in my life (which did keep happening whilst I continued to harbour the hate for people who oppress other lives) and ready to embrace the love whole-heartedly, and will make more conscious choices when it comes to HOW I share my discoveries, personal views and journey with my peers.

Don’t get me wrong – I think its super important to see whats real – the good, the bad and the ugly. I am thankful for what I have been exposed to. I do think it’s important to truly feel those negative feelings in order to make a positive change for yourself. You have to see the extremes to know where you sit on the scale, to help you to understand the full spectrum of options out there. Whilst there is need for the extremist herbivores, as well as the extremist carnivores; I hope that the majority begin to FEEL more and to ask themselves where they think they truly sit on this scale, and to reflect on where you are now and ask yourself if that sits right with your core feelings. That’s how it can all shift for you.

Everyone is on their own journey, so its naive of us all to think that the ONE solution to the world’s problems is veganism – yes, I agree to an extent that a huge shift needs to occur, and I do feel this shift will eventually come and one day we will look back at how we treated our planet and feel the darkness of that time  – but in order to help the shift happen faster, more effectively and be one with a foundation of LOVE – it’s now important for me to leave those old feelings of hurt behind, and start to love myself and humanity again.

After all, it’s us who can make the difference, so instead of all fighting each other – we need to recognise that we are ONE, and that the one REAL solution to all this is to get to know ourselves better and work from the inside, out.

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(can you tell I have watched about 10 spirituality based documentaries in the last 4 days?!?!)

Love, light & plant-based lovin’

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Oh, and must leave you with this happy chap – now isn’t that the life?!

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My first online reading session & 2013 wrap up!

ONE CARD READINGS

I’ve been learning some new spreads with my beautiful tarot deck, and have been itching to practice reading more people, as doing myself can be quite limiting in the intuition department.

Monday night I decided to start a free one card tarot reading session on my Facebook page. I offered it for 30 mins only, to which anyone could come and ask a question and I would shuffle while asking the question and saying the persons name, cut the deck and put back together and read the top card. Some of the cards I needed clarity on, so a few of the ladies had about 2 or 3 cards in their spreads. WOW. It was received so well, and I had a lot of participants, which kept me busy for a good hour! (it felt like I had run a small marathon!)

I did get some great feedback and connections from the free service, so I’m definitely going to make this a regular ‘thing’ on my facebook page, so anyone who missed out – there will be many more opportunities!

I could feel a lot of energy around the thread, as though there were quite a few people hovering over it thinking ‘should I ask’ but then chickened out or weren’t really feelin’ the vibes. Yes – I’m talking to you!! I know you were watching! Anyway, please know that there is no judgement from the questions you ask, and everyone is very respectful there so your question is safe and loved. Next time please just let it go, and see what happens when you put yourself out there…..you never know!

I was finding babies, new business and lots of personal development stuff going on! It was such an awesome energy from a beautiful bunch of souls, if you are one of my ‘clients’ – thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to do that for you, I feel really blessed that you came to me.

Anyway, this is just a short one (lucky you!) to say thank you to everyone who has supported me this year with my transformation, my discoveries, my growth, my ramblings and my healing. It’s been such a huge year for me (on a spirit level) and want you to know that it’s you who has kept me motivated to stay on this path and explore it more and more each day. I’m honestly just blown away by how loving and generous some of my readers, colleagues and friends are. You are all such beautiful creatures.

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Confession: I was going to put a photo of myself today here but last night I dyed my hair and it went the wrong colour :/ (whoops…what is it that they say about blondes, again?!)  – so here’s one I prepared earlier!!

Next year is going to be HUGE for me. I can already feel it. I have clear direction, focus and I’m already working on some great ideas. I look forward to sharing it all with you and am really excited for this new chapter of my life….Now, can you do me one last favour for the year and ask the universe to send me to live in the Sunshine Coast in 2014….. PLEASE!!!

I wish you all a merry christmas and have a fabulous new years

I will most likely be in bed by 10pm but, please, would you have a bloody drink or 10 for me?!?!

So much love, light & gratitude for my fellow soul sisters

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Get your shit together for 2014

shit together

Are you feeling that surge to just get your shit together? and conveniently, its the middle of December so you think – yep! it can be my New Years resolution to do X Y Z….so you have just bought yourself a few more weeks of fluffing around in frazzled land? And then by the time those weeks fly past, whoops! New years hangover, whoops! back to work….whoops…what did I want to do again?! SHIT! Its February….gah, I don’t know where to begin. I’ve missed the boat. Maybe next year….

Well, sorry to burst that little bubble but I’m calling yo’ bluff. I am qualified to do so, because I have THE EXACT SAME THOUGHT PROCESS. And you know what? after 27 years (almost 28!) I still haven’t been able to master the ol’ organisation/planning thing for my own life. Even for a Capricorn, I think the ‘plan own life’ section of traits comes from my floaty Aquarian side.

This year I have spent a lot of my time learning about the elements, and how they play significant roles in our everyday life. You can read all about them on my website here.

Next year is going to be HUGE for me. I feel it might be a bit like that for everyone, too. BIG changes, BIG success’, BIG growth….just BIG energy from all angles. It will be the year of the Horse, which to me represents hard work but also FREEDOM. More opportunity for us to break from the shackles and start to just do more of what we love.

So, lucky for you I’ve been doing my homework and thinking hard about what is most important to me to help manifest these BIG things next year. I think that by working from this angle, it will help to open your mind more on whats important to you, and what you really want to be doing with  your life, not from a career point of view,  but for love.

Everyone has to earn a crust, but at what cost?

Join me on my mission to get my shit together, and keep it that way to help me to be the best version of my amazing self next year, so that all that extra care and time can be put to better use, and I can continue to say ‘I love my life’ with 100% conviction and truth from the heart. Keen?

Firstly, its time for me to get all the ‘I want to do more of that’ things down on paper. Go ahead, grab a pen and paper and list the things you want to be doing more of, and don’t consider money, work, obligations for now….and divide them into the sections below, to help get a bit more clear on where you need your focus to go towards:

ENVIRONMENT: List the things you want to do (or add or remove) for your physical surroundings – For example, renovate the bathroom, plant the vege garden, move house, buy a thermomix, get a new car etc.

RELATIONSHIPS: List the relationships you want to nurture more, or drift apart from. Write their names, think about what you would like to do with this person. for example, visit grandma monthly, fly to London to visit your best friend, write your partner a love letter, take the kids on a holiday to Disneyland.

HEALTH: What things do you want to add, cut back on in your life? How do you want to alter your current lifestyle choices to better your health? list them. For example, green smoothie daily, yoga classes or retreat, do your first juice fast, run the half marathon, cut down on alcohol consumption, eat more plant-based food.

MIND: This one is all about how you intend on feeding your mind. For example, reading those books, studying a course, practicing mediation daily, watch less TV, learn another language. Could just be to ‘stop over thinking’. That’s one on my list.

SPIRIT: List out all the other things you just would LOVE to do, for yourself. It can be as big as climbing mount Everest, and as small as having a bubble bath once a week. Do you wish you could paint more? sing more? write a book? learn how to make a palette bed? what makes your heart sing? go on, write all those things down! Remember – no money and no time restraints here!

Once you have finished your list, look over it. Does it make you excited, or overwhelmed? or both?

Now you have your list, I’ve got something I made for myself to help me to organise these things into my daily life. Its a calendar for the week, but not one you write boring things on like when your rent is due, or what to get from the shops. This is just for you. This is to help to remind you to take care of yourself, and to do those things that will make you that super ‘amazen’ version of yourself.

zen life

What I’ve done is printed it out in colour, laminated it filled it out with thin white board marker – and now i’m in the process of sticking it up somewhere I can see it everyday. I will have my list handy, and when I am looking to update the list (could be weekly, could be fortnightly, monthly…depending on how constant the things are) I refer to the list and throw in the ‘start writing e-book’ part or ‘boot camp starts here’ as I’m wanting to mix things up. Cross it off once its been done, unless its a repeated thing (eg green smoothies).

The idea is to just pick one of those things for each day of the week. That way you are not completely overwhelmed by your 100’s of things to do. BUT you are motivated and clear in your intentions for each day, planned out for the full week.

This calendar is going to help you to get everything back into balance, so you don’t forget to nurture any elements of your life. For myself in particular, I know the element of fire (movement, motivation, desire) has not been nurtured enough in the past years, so I need to focus on doing something from this category each day until it becomes second nature.

Here’s what the calendar looks like. GUIDE TO THE AMAZEN LIFE

It’s called The Amazen Life because I know for myself, I want to have the amazing life I envision but I also want it to remain true to me, to keep me ‘zen’ and centred and focused on my spirit and it’s intentions.

You can get your own PDF version of this calendar by signing up to my weekly e-updates here or at the bottom of this post.

If this has got you raring to go, I have a couple more resources to share with you to help you to get CLEAR on your intentions for 2014. I just completed an amazing workbook by Susannah Conway , I really love reflecting and projecting and visualising – it’s helped me to really see what it is I want, and how to map it out and get it. I particularly enjoyed coming up with ONE word that represents my year next year, and I chose the word OPPORTUNITY. If you do this workbook or have done it, please share with me your word?!

get your FREE copy of the workbook here

Another one that was recommended to me was the Leonie Dawsons’ ‘create you best life’ workbook, you can check it out here. I haven’t done it yet but it has come highly recommended to me, and not to mention I’m absolutely in love with Leonie’s energy and will definitely be using all her organisation and business platforms this year to help me to become a successful business woman! her workbook is $9.95, well worth the investment according to my peers.

Get yours here.

 Love, light & AMAZEN LIFE!

Sarah xox

Do you feel the pull? The global shift in consciousness

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Do you feel the pull?

Do you crave individuality?

Are you embracing change?

Do you feel an unexplainable urge to be a better version of you, always?

Have you grown tired of what you were taught and conditioned to believe?

Are you seeing signs?

Are you feeling more ‘awake’?

Can you sense something big is coming for human kind?

Do you feel a growing conscious towards your actions, and others?

Feel like you are no longer having fun, you carry the weight of the world on your shoulders?

Do you take your life very seriously?

Do you feel extra pressure to make improvements, be more ‘you’?

If you answered yes to most of those questions, you are not alone. I say yes to all of this, too.

So, what the hell is going on? Why is there so much back and forth in your world? So much hate and love, destruction and repair, war and peace, suffering and salvation – on a BIG scale, and constantly coming at us from all directions?

There are a lot of theories, philosophies and explanations out there on the internet. Basically, I’ve been noticing it more and more as I continue to change my ways, learn more about myself – and its a common theme that it all stems back to this – the global shift in consciousness.

We are embarking on times where a big change is coming. A time where we, as individuals begin to awaken our inner selves and find a new voice, a new confidence and self-mastery.

It has been playing out for years now, and as time progresses in this shift, the movement grows deeper, thicker, faster and stronger – a domino affect from the vibrations we omit when we shift our own conscious thoughts to these new ways of thinking, feeling and being. We are changing on a CELLULAR LEVEL.

You are apart of the universes’ grand plans to change. Don’t worry if you haven’t felt it, it doesn’t make you any less important, any less special. You too have importance in all of this, you are helping us to understand everything better, where there is yin their is yang to balance it. For how do we know what light is, if we do not know what dark is first?

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It is no coincidence that you feel unusual connections to people you normally wouldn’t like/vibe with, or that you see things at the right time and place in your life, that you can’t explain why you feel a sudden urge to do something different, that you have a confidence to break from the pack, that other people seem to be doing and saying the same thing as you, at the same time without it being planned. You share the same interests, you try new things at the same time.

There are underground movements happening in the masses based on health, wellness, fitness, spirituality, creative industries, self expression, personal growth, healing, DIY, getting back to basics, nature, organic, cleaning living, detox, aid work, charity, less material wealth and people are choosing to follow careers they are passionate about, that feed their soul more than their wallets.

This is not a phase. It is going from strength to strength. Sure, it’s level of potency depends on what circle you run with, but once you start noticing one thing, it will always lead to another – and sooner or later, the old stuff becomes less interesting, less important and the new stuff becomes your mission. Your passion. Your purpose.

leonardo

Fascinated with symbols? Always seeing triangles, circles, mandalas, the moon? It’s in the latest fashions, film clips, all over social media. This is connected too. Its your DNA relating to its origins – it’s called sacred geometry. It’s cellular memory. All life started as geometric shapes (this is a very in depth tangent – will do a separate post on this topic).

Are you noticing we are being urged to get off devices, enjoy the little things, live the life the quotes say. Quotes are everywhere, inspiration coming at us left, right and centre. We are living in a time where no longer are we VICTIMS to our genetics, our upbringing, our disposition or ourselves – we are OWNING our own desires, our true selves and one by one, are beginning to see that we are the MASTERS of our own destiny, our own lives. We have the control. We have the power to do anything, to say anything – to inspire others to break out too.

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But why is there still so much devastation, so much violence and unrest in society, if this shift is taking place?

In my understanding, it’s because as much as we know how to love well, we also know how to fear well, too. (This goes back to the light and dark topic).

Our two most natural states are in fear, or in love. We are afraid. We resist change because it is a feeling we do not know well. We fear the unknown. We are comfortable with what we know, and have always known – for generations upon generations. The religion-based wars and battles amongst the corporations ALL have one common discourse – they do not embrace individuality. For, if you are an individual, you are harder to control. We have been conditioned to focus more on the rules bestowed upon us from the “powerful” and have in turn, disconnected our intuition, our individual thought and our own power. We have been taught that we are less, in all aspects – we must fear them.

It is only natural to resist change, for what we already know is much ‘safer’ to rely on.

Thankfully, times are changing. I have been seeing the signs – left, right and centre. I ask a question, I get the answer. It is right there if I place my consciousness upon it. I personally no longer feel like a victim, I no longer feel afraid or insecure – I have a voice, I have an individual spirit who wants to dance to its own freakin’ beat. I don’t care if my fish pond is small, my outreach of contacts is minute – I no longer fear failure.

WE ARE SO POWERFUL. You are not just one person, you are one person – in a vast sea of individuals who also happen to feel the way you do, about a lot of things. Things we haven’t felt before. We are entering uncharted waters ahead, but we are together. We choose our own path, we think our own thoughts and live our own lives, but we do it in syncronocity. That is a beautiful and powerful place to be.

What am I referring to, specifically? Well, I can only speak upon my own path – but in a very short amount of time I have discovered that the foods I was brought up on are not right for my body to thrive and grow and be conscious on, we have the ability to be able to heal ourselves of almost anything (if that is our souls purpose to do so), the animals on this planet are not here for humans – they also have their own journeys and purpose in the circle and cycle of life, I have a beautiful mind, body & soul to which I never once acknowledged its power up until recent times, there is a god, but not the way I have been taught – WE ARE GOD, we all have the same power as him (and this global shift in consciousness proves this theory because of the monumentous changes that are unfolding before us are coming to fruition) the natural world we live in plays a crucial role on our evolution and survival and I for one now know to nurture mother nature and her gifts, in order to restore her faith in us as carers of this planet, we are all connected in ways we cannot imagine, and the world is small and we ALL play an important role in evolution, natural disasters and wars are not a coincidence, they are not just random occurrences. (I could go on, but I hope you catch my drift).

How can you help to shift your conscious?

Start by paying attention. Follow your intuition, listen to your gut. Ask questions. Read, read, read. Be open minded. Pay attention to your thoughts – try to only think only positive ones. Don’t pay attention to the negitive news stories. Put your energy into doing what you love. Stop hatin’. Love yourself. Don’t do anything out of fear. Ditch the victim mentality. Put yourself back in power. Care for yourself, nurture your needs. Don’t fight it. Let it be. Go with the flow. Embrace your flaws. Own your power. Fear nothing. Join the revolution. Shift the gears. Be strong. Be yourself.

And, if you’re not sure what to think of all this – check out these amazing individuals who all begun as little babies like you and I, who evolved and shifted their conscious and decided to be individuals, and to help unite those individuals and move them up higher to the next level. Well-being is ours, if we want it. If we choose it.

Viva la-revolution!

Matt Damon – The problem is civil obedience

Russell Brand – Revolution rant on Paxman

Alan Watts – What if money was no object?

2012: Consciousness Shift

Paradise or Oblivion: The Venus Project (full length documentary movie)

Thrive: What on earth will it take? (full length documentary movie)

And one that is a great summary for this post – Believe it or not, I found this clip AFTER I wrote out this blog post. I haven’t really “researched” things, more just put all the puzzle pieces together for myself, and it all finally makes sense, there has been reason for all of whats being going on within me.

check this out.

10 signs of spiritual awakening

If you have other links similar to the above – please share them with me! 

Love, light & awakening,

Sarah xox

 

Reflections on my first year of #mumlife

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We celebrated our beautiful son’s first birthday last week, Tuesday 5th of November (remember, remember). In the week leading up to his birthday, I started getting all kinds of nostalgic about the end of the biggest year of my life, to date.

What. A. Year. 365 days of tears, tantrums, turds, heart-exploding love and pretty much everything in between. I had felt my absolute rock bottom, and my absolute most joy – all in the same little year.

It’s seen me reflecting on how much I have learnt, about myself, about being a woman, about myself as a mother. I will admit now that I was soooo utterly unprepared for motherhood, that in hindsight – I was so stupidly naive about the whole thing, I’m a little embarrassed. My lack of knowledge really did throw me in the deep end, but I guess thats the way life goes – I wouldn’t change anything. I did read a few of the stock-standard books like “what to expect when your expecting” but in all honestly, those books taught me jack shit. The real learning comes when your smacked in the face with it. When you hear other mums say to you “you can never be ready” to have a baby – its 100% true.1000% true. 

Being the ‘first cab off the rank’ out of my group of friends meant I was to learn the ropes on my own, and to find the answers in unlikely places. I had to learn what kind of mother I was, while I was mothering. At some of the darkest moments, when you feel like you are so incredibly alone, helpless and inundated, comes a strength only a mother truly knows. Its the same strength that pushes that sucker out, that goes days without sleep, that will miss out on her old social and professional life, just so that her baby has everything it needs, always.  

I thought It might be cute (or scary?!) of me to share some of my reflections with any of my audience who are either eventually going to be, are about to be, or already are – mothers. Be warned, this list may make you giggle til’ a little wee wee comes out, make your ovaries shrivel up and die, have you screwing your nose up in utter disgust  or perhaps a little of all three. These are dedicated especially to my online mum friends from all over Australia, who have helped to shape the woman and mother I am today. Thank you, sisters.

 Here they are, my reflections on my first year of #mumlife

 (these are simply my own truths, yours may or may not look a little different)

On a Mental level:

1. There will be times you hate being a mum. There, I said it. And this does not make you a bad person. It just means your adjusting. I hated being a mum at times when I was far too tired, too sore, too emotional, felt too restricted or too scared. Luckily, these feelings are mostly fleeting. Just know, there are good days and very, very bad ones. On those days, just have NO expectations. Just go with it. Pyjama’s are the new black.

 2. Your hormones will reck havoc on your life. Yes, we all know that pregnant women have crazy hormones – but so do new mums! I cried everyday for the first few weeks of my son’s life. sometimes, for pretty much no reason. I would fixate on the smallest things, and could just not shake them, I needed to cry to get over it. But its not just an overwhelming sadness, EVERYTHING is off balance. I would also laugh at EVERYTHING! on the tv, at peoples shitty jokes – an uncontrollable laughter, to the point where sometimes it would then turn into a cry. A happy, happy sobbing cry. Beware, some days you can’t even string a sentence together, somedays your the mega bitch from hell. somedays, all you want is cake. Somedays, you might yell out just the word “CAKEEEE” whilst crying uncontrollably. Somedays, you feel so much love you think you might spontaneously combust. It’s all one big hormone party, and your the hostess with the ‘mostest’!

 On a Physical level:

 3. Breast feeding is f*ing hard sometimes. Don’t be just like me and assume it’s ‘natural’ and will ‘just happen’. Ask EVERYONE you know and trust, about it. Add yourself to breast feeding Facebook groups and pages, read about things like tongue ties, mastitis and how to boost supply. Education (or lack there of) is the main reason why most women give up before they want to. I have learnt so much about it since having my son, so much so that now I am super passionate about it, and we are still going strong. I have previously blogged about this topic and did say it was much harder than anything I have ever done – don’t be naive like I was, ask a breastfeeder all the intricate details, or at least know who to call upon when and if you ever need advice/help/assurance. Oh and one last thing, don’t freak out when you wake up in a pool of your own milk. Have a towel on standby.

 4. Yes, a little bit of wee might often trickle out. Your pelvic floor is shot to shit. It’s the most uncomfortable feeling, and sometimes it can take a good 6 months for it to feel ‘normal’ again. I started some light PT work around the 6-8 month mark PP, and yep – a little bit of wee wee came out when I skipped rope. Get straight onto those kegels girlfriends, that cheeky little tight pelvic floor (where none of us know where the hell it really is) is whats keeping you from having to rock a Tena lady at age 27.

5. Your body is a wonderland. A weird, wrinkly, squishy, pudgy, hairy, pimply, pigmented wonderland. Before children, you feel so insecure about your weight, your skin, your this, your that. I know I did. Pregnancy I felt like a glowing unicorn princess, until I reached the end and looked more like a swollen white whale – but my point is, that after you birth a child – your priorities change. You haven’t got nearly as much time to obsess over looks, and I have come to terms with the fact that this is me, this is what I’ve got to work with. I may have been slightly over weight, but my inner dialog neglected to mention that I had just grew and birthed a beautifully happy, healthy little baby boy and fuck that is so amazing. MY body made HIS body, from nothing. I sometimes still can’t believe it. When you start to see your body as the wonderful vessel that it is, you care less, and you feel more at peace, and can crack on with what really matters. I might also add that this year has been a huge eye opener for me in understanding nutrition and health – particularly now I am in charge of that of another’s life. I’ve decided to shift my focus on providing my amazing body with the nutrients it needs to repair and rebuild after all that work its done for me over the last 2 years. Once you have a new life to grow, you realise just how crappy your diet habits are, they all affect your baby in some way….and when it comes time to sharing your food habits with your little one, you are really put to the test. Owning my bad habits, and tossing them to the side has helped me to feel much more positive about my beautiful body, and now the stretch marks are permanent residents (for now) and I accept them.

6.Your hair will fall out at an alarming rate. During pregnancy, you are lulled into a false sense of security when your hair thickens up and everyday looks like you just walked out of a hair salon. After birth (about 3 months I think is the usual time) your body decides to shed ALL that it had held onto over that year of no-shedding, and you are left with the limpest, driest, and sometimes semi-balding head on the planet. Just because we have nothing else to worry about, right!?!? Hence, the #MUMCHOP – ever notice why a lot of new mums head to the salon for their first big day away from their new babes and come out with all their long locks gone?? NO, we aren’t all copying each other, its not some haircut cult – it’s because we are all half bloody bald and got sick of our babies ripping out the rest direct from the scalp. Hello easy to manage, short and sweet.

 On an Emotional level:

7. You and your partner will struggle. I can see how couples split up with young children, I honestly can. There is a good few months there were I swear we barely spoke to each other, properly. It was always just ‘I’m having a shower, can you watch him’ ‘I just changed a poo, it’s your turn’ ‘ewww we’ve got a cat5, I’m gonna need more wipes!’. Romantic, huh?! Having children really changes your relationship. In the beginning, I recall actually crying because I missed my partner so much (cheers for that, hormones). He was home with me everyday, but I just missed ‘us’. Suddenly you rarely snuggle in bed at night, you rarely say ‘goodnight’. It’s the little things you realise you really need in order to still feel special to one another, and you can both feel very neglected. Just know, that with time, while you both learn who you are as parents and continue to build your rhythm together as parents, things will slowly come back, but it’s something you always have to make time for now – its no longer just an automatic thing. Caring for a young human takes 99% of your attention, all day, everyday. As long as you both remember you are a TEAM, that parenting is a partnership, that you both need nurturing too – and always keep in mind that their will be good years, and challenging years TOGETHER, you will be ok. I promise. communication is key, and fighting doesn’t help.

8. The inner wolf mother will strike. If you have ever dared to offer a new mum unwanted parenting advice, do you realise how lucky you are to still have your head in tact?! I know I am 100% guilty of this one too. When you become a mum, you feel like you have learnt all this new amazing stuff and when others start to join the club behind you, of course you want to share your wonderful ‘wisdom’ with them! It’s only natural to want to help others with their parenting journeys, but there is one thing we all must be mindful of  – NONE OF US WILL PARENT EXACTLY LIKE YOU DO, and YOU WILL NEVER PARENT EXACTLY LIKE I DO. Be very careful about how you approach a new mother when it comes to anything to do with how she chooses to parent, be mindful she is already defensive, already in protection mode, always ready to strike those who prey on her and her cub/s. It’s nothing against you, its just her instinct. It’s in our DNA. “The hormones made me do it!” Please hold back on judgement, please think before you comment, please always see it from a place of ‘the mother is only doing what she feel is best for her baby’ and understand that her whole world is her baby, and that its never our place to judge.

 On an Environmental level:

9. Nothing is sacred. Nothing. Everything will be shat on. Everything will be vomited on. Your nice clothes? Your beautiful jewellery? Will rot in the closet. Don’t buy expensive furniture, carpets, ornaments… Don’t bother meticulously cleaning every nap time. Just don’t bother… I chose to just enjoy my time being a grot with my boy than further exhausting myself by cleaning up after the tornado baby. After all, it’s the perfect opportunity to just stop all the crap and reassess whats important, and to me – cleaning is very low on my important list.

 10. Every moment of your life now comes with an audience. Shower time? More like feeding time at the zoo (breast feeding joke), need to poop? Ha! More like a great time to sit down with one leg blocking one side of the toilet to stop little people from grabbing the toilet paper stack, whilst hugging the toilet brush in your lap, yelling ‘don’t eat that!’ As your reaching for the getaway toilet roll which has been chomped on and 47 metres have unravelled as it’s been pulled around the floor. Ahhhhh *bliss*

11. You learn the real value of time. Think you had no time to do anything BEFORE children?! pffft!  Calling your bluff! Time gains it’s TRUE value when you truly have none to yourself. Don’t get me wrong, I love my boy like nothing else in this universe, but since he has come along – he has taught me the appreciation of time. When I do get time to myself, say at nap time, I have no idea how long it’s going to last so boy do I make the most of it! Even if it’s to make a tea and sit on Facebook, I appreciate every single second. I’ve managed to do more book reading, more researching, more learning, more social interactions, more writing, more designing and more thinking, more cooking and creating than EVER before! And all because I know how precious the gift of time is, and I now know how to truly use it wisely.

 12. You will find friends in unlikely places. Now that you have a little one, you will be stopped in the street, in the supermarket, you will be smiled at by strangers, get parenting advice from randoms and also find yourself in a tribe of other like-minded mothers who you may not have ever connected with pre baby. I see this one as a bit of our instinctual nature coming through subconsciously – traditionally, women have always banded together, raising their children together, gathered food and water together, learnt from our elders on womanly matters and its in our nature to seek counsel with other women once we embark on our motherhood journey. Doing it alone is far too hard, it takes a lot of communication, a lot of time, a lot of thought, a lot of compassion, a lot of understanding to raise a child. Embrace your new mummy friends, and if you don’t have any – go and find some! it will make you feel like your apart of something special, a movement for the next generation. My friends have referred to it as mothers club, and yes, it can be seen like that – but just know this is imperative to our children’s development, their education, their health and our sanity. We all need friends, our babies too!

 

 On a Spiritual level:

13. Sleep replaces everything. Drinking, dancing, sex, eating, watching TV, exercising – everything. Sleep is the only thing that keeps a mum from being admitted to an asylum. I used to always complain about being “tired” – and man if I could go back and visit the pre-baby me I would probably give her a swift kick right in the kisser. In the beginning, when you are learning your rhythm with your new little bundle of joy, sleep is non-existent. Napping is your best friend, at anytime of day, or night. Napping is our little secret to surviving the first year (and maybe more) of our child’s life. I will proudly admit that I will day nap at least 1-2 times a week, just to get through the day. 

14. You will be tested. Your partner might say “what do you do all day?” your friends might say “oh I never see you anymore” an older adult or grandparent might say “this is how we did it and my kids turned out ok”. My advice is to just breathe. At the end of the day, its your life, your children and your priorities have changed. I have had MANY tests this year within all my relationships, and sometimes you have to accept that your choices may not suit everyone else, and yes they might put their judgey pants on, but those choices suit you and your family, and thats the way it should be. Another mother friend of mine expressed how she now bases all her decisions on a type of ladder of priorities, her kids come FIRST, then herself and partner, then her family, then her friends. This has been something I have found hard to do, but it does get easier as you grow stronger in your family values, and as more experiences as a parent are had. Always go with your gut, always trust your instinct. Motherhood is not a popularity contest, its about building trust with your child, whilst providing them with all the tools they need to be happy and healthy adults.

15. A new appreciation is found. If you are anything like me, you will find that being at home, all wrapped up in another little life will make you think about your own roots. You discover a lot about yourself, and your place here on earth, at this moment. A lot of things are put into their place, you might find you do a lot of soul searching, growing – after all, your world has now completely changed – you are now responsible for another life, you want to make theirs special, more special than your own. Gone is your old career title, and in its place is ‘mum’. Enjoy how ever long you have away from other distractions like work and use the time to really reflect on what it is you want for the rest of your life. Again, like me – you might find that not only have you physically birthed, but also spiritually, too. This year I reconnected with my spirit and I have my son to thank for that. 

16. The feeling of being a mother is like nothing else on the planet. Here’s where things get deep. Creating life is a gift. Some take this for granted, some wish their children away and blame them for holding them back. Some don’t know how to coupe so they detach from their spirits and go against what their instincts tell them, in order to get through the tough times. Although its hard for me to comprehend other mother’s actions, I must always keep focused on MY journey. My journey is to break the cycle, to teach my children things I did not learn as early. Everyone’s journey is different. The love I feel for my son is indescribable. Sometimes, I just watch him and smile. He is like pure sunshine. The innocence, the beauty he sees in the simplest of things, is inspiring. I can’t believe a whole year has past, and that after a year, my love for him still grows. You never know true love until you make it, in its most pure, physical form.

So, as you can see – its a pretty intense year! And those are just the things I can remember! Which, I feel is pretty impressive given that its not unusual for me to forget my wallet more than once in the same day. In closing, I would love to share with you a little poem I have written dedicated to my darling boy, my little light.

Dedicated to Billy Wilder

Love, light and #mumlife


Sarah xox