Hello my gorgeous readers. I’m in a particularly chipper mood this evening, so lets keep this flow happening, shall we?
In true Sarah form, I came up with another idea this week, which I think will be a BIG task – but one I think will change the world. Yep, I said it. I believe in this idea SO MUCH that I think its going to be much bigger than anything I have ever thought up before….yet its so so simple, cheap and universal! Now I hate people who wave the carrot like that (its called ‘VAGUEBOOKING’ on Facebook – we all know those people “OMG I just heard the best news! I can’t wait until I’m allowed to share it!” there is always one, isn’t there?!?!) I am very sorry for mentioning it, but I guess I just love that my life is so full of creativity, ideas, inventions and fluidity and I am grateful to be able to walk a path now that allows for me to follow through with and nurture these ideas. I’m in a really good place and feel like things really are looking up, up and up forever more. Just keep this seed planted in your mind for a little while and know that I’m going to knock your socks off one day with this amazing ‘thing’, so just expect it, ok?!
I recently had a convo with a soul sister, and we were discussing life, friends and relationships. We were just commenting on how relationships with people change as we get older, and how it effects us. I made a comment that I have known alot of people for a really long time in our circle of friends, yet I don’t REALLY know them. I’m talking people who I would socialise with most weekends, for years and years (some of them I have known for 10+ years). These ‘friends’ I would have a drink with, smoke a cigarette with, have a dance with or talk drunk shit with time and time again, even have personal jokes with, but I really have no idea who they actually are. While I’m at it, I must note they don’t really know who I am either.
How did it get like this? I know this whole “anti-social media” thing is going on, where we are all discussing just how dis-connected we are from reality and are losing all concept of how to actually communicate with REAL people in REAL life, and I do think their is merit, and I do think its partially right, but I think this has been going on well before social media took hold of our hand-held lives…I think we might be a little big quick to blame it for ruining our social skills, but I honestly don’t think we had very good ones to start with? Infact, the online relationships I have now are at a point where I do consider these people on a higher friendship level than I would with the ones from my real one? Is that sad? or maybe just a reality we face in this tech-obsessed world we live in?
As I was saying, I have known people for over 10 years, but wouldn’t even know what really makes them tick. Sure, I might know their brother or sisters name, I might know what they do for a living (although some people I know would probably still ask me how hairdressing is going) and know where they live – but thats all I have to show for 10 years? Hell, good old facey-B could have taught me those things in 5 minutes of creeping, and would save me the bother of deciding over those 10 years whether they were really going to make it onto my wedding invite list or not….).
Maybe social media outlets like facebook and instagram are helping us to broaden our friendship groups and find others we truly connect with, much more than current life allows us to find. Perhaps I could even go as far to say that as these platforms develop, it shapes our society in such a way that we now have much more opportunity in terms of finding a wider range of friendships, interests and knowledge. There are no excuses for being naive, narrow minded or backwards, there is far too much information being circulated right now that we are no longer restricted in anyway… Surely that’s a good thing? Of course, on the other side is the coin are the negatives – bullying, false information and anti-social behaviour, but I think for the majority – we just want to be ourselves. We crave the connection with others. We want to follow leads and maybe have a bit of a giggle in between.
There’s no denying that I spend alot of my time on social media, but as I have to keep defending to my loved ones – I’m not just sitting there spying on people (much), I’m not watching many videos of goats dubbed over the new Justin Beiber track (much) I’m actually developing relationships, like I would like to in my everyday life. Since becoming a stay at home mum, my social scene consists of myself and my infant, and my dog for the whole day. When I do get a phone call, my son finds it so interesting that he has to have the phone, eat it and take it away to play with, while I’m on it… when I talk, he demands my attention, he wants IN on EVERYTHING. Needless to say, real phone convo’s are few and far between these days. When my partner gets home from work, theres the daily updates, maybe a family walk or not, throw in showers, dinner and cleaning and some quiet time before bed and the cycle repeats. So how on earth am I able to interact with lots of different people to keep my mind stimulated, learning, engaged and properly vented? this is why social media is so important to people like me. I enjoy being on my own, but I also crave the silly banter, the over analysis, the learning, the connection and the venting. On these platforms, I am able to do all of this, and tick all the boxes without feeling completely exhausted like I would have at a real life social gathering of friends.
I have such an amazing online community around me, one that knows alot more about me than alot of my friends and long-term acquaintances. I can ask them questions about things that are so not of the interests of my regular social circle, I can share stories, heart aches, triumphs of everyday life which are relevant to the circle at hand. What do I mean? for example, I’m into health and wellness, juice fasting etc – so – I’m a member of a juice fasting community group and we all talk about it and learn from one another. In no way would I have found these people by hitting the social scene in real life. Same can be said for parenting, entrepreneurs, breastfeeding, business development, healthy cooking, animal symbolism, spiritual guidance (the list goes on) – I don’t think that being on social media for these purposes are doing me any harm, if anything, I’m learning or growing faster, getting information more efficiently which allows for me to truly engage when I am physically spending time with friends and family, and makes me appreciate them and make the most of that time more. We can talk about things relevant to our relationship, and for it to not be yawn worthy if I talk about a new vegan paleo recipe I found and follow with a photo display of said dish… I can leave that for the onliners.
Conveniently, my 10 year high school reunion is this weekend. Out of a grade of around 150 young ladies, I think only 1/3 of them will be (hopefully) attending. It’s a sad reflection of this whole social media world, and I’m sure it’s the excuse for alot of people who feel that they have no need to catch up with any long lost friends because you already know everything there is to know about them from their online accounts. Yes, I agree. I think the reunion is a dieing event. However, I feel like I need to go so that I still get to put my social skills into practice. I can still get dressed up with my girlfriends, feel those real life butterflies, worry about whether I will forget someone’s name or embarrass myself on the dance floor. I can still feel that awkward silence, see those fake smiles or those judgemental stares… But you know what – I want those things! They make you feel alive! I want to prove to myself that I am more than just an online profile. I don’t want to miss out on any genuine re-connections. I loved high school, I love my life. I have nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. I don’t have a paying job, I don’t have alot of on paper smarts – but that doesn’t make me any less successful compared to the doctors, lawyers or the world travellers or the athletes. I am living my life the way I designed it, why not celebrate those last 10 years of discovery and growth together? I may have spent the last 10 years just searching, but they certainly haven’t been a waste – they have shaped who I am today, and I am proud of that.
I’ve noticed a bit of a ‘trend’ on Instagram where you share what your doing with your followers, or little challenges about what your wearing, what your favourite colour is and whatever else the new thing is… So I’m going to join in and in celebration for the 10 years out of high school, here’s
10 things you may not know about me (Aka I haven’t put on social media) *note this was hard because I have blogged about alot of things too so I’ve tried to not include those.
1. I have grey hairs on my head (my dad went completely grey in his 20’s)
2. I have really small chubby hands and are my least favourite part of my body
3. I haven’t had a commercial soft drink since April this year
4. I have had over 2000 views of my little blog so far (thats exciting to me, perhaps not great compared to others, but I am proud)
5. I sometimes put salt on my apples
6. I still have a dream of being a hip hop dancer (and haven’t completely given up on it!)
7. I have a secret YouTube video with over 4000 views (whoops, not so secret now…)
8. I am planning on settling to live on the Sunshine Coast in the next few years, and hopefully will stay there for good!
9. I have never tried/done any illicit drugs (apart from marijuana)
10. Out of the 5 different tafe and uni courses and degrees I have started, only 1 was ever completed.
I hope that has taken a bit of the edge off the big pink elephant in the room at the reunion this weekend, and look foward to re-connecting with some real life people! Maybe our ice breaking question can be “what don’t I know about you now!”…. get your answers ready ladies! might spark some interesting convo’s
Love, light and 10 years of searching,